Sports world too whiny
New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady talks to the media at Gillette Stadium.Greg M. Cooper-USA TODAY Sports
There used to be a time when society never questioned the overlap between machismo and our culture’s obsession with sports.
But of late it seems like the vox populi have devolved sports into a whiny nitpick fest of petty complaints and political correctness.
It’s time we finally asked the important question: Is the sports world now dominated by total crybabies?
For a while we’ve been subjected to the ridiculous conversations over whether we should ban checking in hockey, ban keeping score in children’s sports and just generally ban anything that distinguishes athleticism from knitting circles.
Because of this, I’ve stopped watching most sports. The blather has just become too ridiculous. I’m now only into wrestling (both real and fake) and golf. And I only like that last one because I can drink booze and smoke cigars while playing.
After the Patriots trounce the Seahawks this coming Sunday, you can bet the main thing people will debate at the water cooler Monday morning isn’t the merits of the game. It’ll be about whether the wardrobe malfunction at the half-time show was too heteronormative.
The conversation will only get worse in the years ahead too. After all, just last week we were reminded that female soccer players filed a human rights complaint against FIFA and the Canada Soccer Association because they’ll be playing on artificial turf at this year’s women’s World Cup instead of real grass and that’s not fair because the boys have real grass.
(It was in the news again because they’ve now decided to drop the complaint.)
Really? A human rights violation? Only in these entitled times could anyone seriously use a phrase once reserved for genocide to apply to something like this.
Just spend more time focused on kicking ass and people will pay more to see you and then the league can afford better turf.
And let’s be honest. If a sport’s big world final is being played in Moncton, New Brunswick, it’s not a real sport.
Speaking of aesthetics. Remember when all male athletes’ faces used to look like the Cryptkeeper made love to a meat cleaver? I’m thinking in particular of one former Maple Leaf who shall remain nameless. Now that was a respectable looking bruiser.
But then Mr. Posh Spice came along and ruined it all. And now Canada’s most iconic hockey personality is looking, acting and dressing more and more like Joan Rivers every year.
These days, whenever I see pictures of those eurotrash soccer players walking around with their supermodel girlfriends, it’s hard to tell which one’s the player.
If they’re talking about you more on Entertainment Tonight than ESPN, you’re not a real athlete.
And what’s with this handwringing over Eugenie Bouchard doing a little twirl? A Toronto Star columnist went so far as to compare it to the Jian Ghomeshi saga: “both events cut to the heart of our society’s unequal treatment of the sexes and of the way females are socialized in our society.”
Unequal?! Guess you could say that. Bouchard’s going to go on to score multimillion-dollar merchandising deals because folks like her look.
If you’ve got it, flaunt it. The only problem is, today’s sports culture is losing it.